“Urgent message to dads: you are the untapped secret weapon in the war on gender inequality! Want to show some real male ally chops, up your gender intelligence, and knock down gendered barriers for your daughters and other women you care about in the workplace? Then Michelle Travis’s Dads for Daughters is a must read! Meticulously researched and powerfully written, this is the dude’s playbook and toolbox for truly showing up for women at work as an advocate and a warrior for gender equality. A real game-changer for gender allyship and changing workplace culture. Go Dads Go!” ―W. Brad Johnson & David Smith, authors of Athena Rising: How and Why Men Should Mentor Women, and professors in the Department of Leadership, Ethics and Law at the U.S. Naval Academy
“As the dad of two young daughters, I have become more aware of their futures and ways to advance gender equality in arenas like the Silicon Valley’s tech industry. Dads for Daughters shares stories of inspiring role models and a wealth of resources for other dads who would like to get involved in expanding equal opportunities for girls and women. If you’re a dad who wants to create a fairer and more equal world for your daughters to thrive in, this book is a must-read!” ―Jerry Yang, cofounder & former CEO of Yahoo! Inc., and founder of AME Cloud Ventures
“If you are the dad of a daughter who is worried about her future and wondering how to help, this book offers a magical combination of social science and practical tips.” ―Joan Williams, Coauthor of What Works for Women at Work: Four Patterns Working Women Need to Know
“In Dads for Daughters, Michelle Travis shows how dads can play a powerful role in the inside game for women's equality by becoming allies, advocates, and supporters for their daughters' cause. Though the fight for gender equality must engage all members of society, dads are in a unique position to anticipate and observe as their daughters enter careers in a vastly unequal playing field for leadership and financial gain. In fact, each chapter of this compelling book addresses a daunting issue that women continue to face in the workplace, along with a call to action in "How Dads Can Get Started"―a chapter section that offers a compendium of organizations, initiatives, and mentoring opportunities for dads to accelerate the progress women have already made. With inspiring examples of how dads have advocated for their daughters, including NBA greats Stephen Curry and Coach Gregg Popovich, Michelle motivates other dads to follow their lead. This is an essential book for every dad, no matter the age of his daughter―dads for daughters can never stop!” ―Kate Farrell, librarian, storyteller, & author of Story Power: Secrets to Creating, Crafting, and Telling Memorable Stories
“While there's no parental prerequisite to fight for gender equality, Michelle Travis's book, Dads for Daughters: How Fathers Can Support Girls and Women for a Successful Feminist Future, speaks profoundly, positively and deeply to men and fathers. Drawing on examples and research from the boardroom, office, courtroom and sports field to the family room, Travis shares stories about the actions men have taken to make a difference. This book will expertly and comprehensively inspire and guide you with resources and the immediate actions you can take to build a better future for yourself, those you work with and those you love.” ―Rania Anderson, keynote speaker and author of WE: Men, Women and the Decisive Formula for Winning at Work
“This is a must-read for all men, not just dads. While I believe fathers of daughters have a special responsibility, all men need to do this for the women in their lives including the daughters of their co-workers and colleagues. It’s time to acknowledge that men still hold a majority of the positions of power within most organizations. That said, the onus is on us to be part of the solution to address the hidden systemic and cultural issues that continue to plague our organizations. Thankfully, Michelle Travis presents a compelling case for gender equality along with a variety of big and small actions to bring about change. Most importantly, she offers a handbook to help us find a place to start and the encouragement that there is a role for each of us to spark change.” ―Jeffery Tobias Halter, president of YWomen and author of WHY WOMEN: The Business Imperative to Advancing Women and Engaging Men
“Few books both offer inspiring stories and, at the same time, imminently practical and tactical suggestions for social change. Dads for Daughters does both exceptionally well. Its interviews and case studies are heart-warming and fascinating, and, even as a mom of two sons, I walked away with a helpful to-do list. Michelle has me completely convinced in the power of the dads of daughters to make the world a better place for all women.” ―Lori Mihalich-Levin, JD, Founder of Mindful Return and Author of Back to Work After Baby: How to Plan and Navigate a Mindful Return from Maternity Leave
“As a father of three kids (two girls & a boy), I am excited to read the stories of these dads who want to get involved in creating equal opportunities for women so our next generation of girls can fulfill their dreams. This book is filled with concrete advice and resources to support dads of daughters who want to advance gender equality in their communities and workplaces, including in male-dominated arenas like STEM. I wish I had this resource as I was creating the Ella the Engineer comic book.” ―Anthony Onesto, creator & founder of Ella the Engineer
“Thoroughly researched and thought-provoking―must reading for dads of daughters, and anyone else who wants to see a future in which women have the same opportunities as men. The book is inspiring and packed full of ideas for taking immediate action.” ―Greg Helmstetter, co-creator of STEAMTeam 5
“Grounded in...so many interesting stories, Professor Travis provides details, facts, and data on gender inequality that should embarrass us as a nation. In 2020, we have so much more ground to cover in order to achieve equality for our daughters, wives, sisters, and mothers. Dads for Daughters is something that every father of daughters should read and join in the battle on their behalf. In fact, even fathers or men without daughters should read the book and join the battle.” ―ImmigrationProf Blog
Excerpt. © Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.
Chapter 3
Welcoming Girls into STEM
Even after three decades, Qusi Alquarqaz still adores being an electrical engineer. He always hoped that his two daughters would follow in his footsteps, but his plan was not to be. After his first daughter, Rawan, announced that she wanted to study fashion design and business, Qusi pinned his remaining hope on his younger daughter, Ryzan. She recently told her dad that she might go to law school to become an international lawyer. Qusi will support her no matter what career she chooses, but he still had a lingering desire to convince at least one daughter of the joys of being an engineer.
With almost thirty years of experience in the power industry, Qusi could make a persuasive case. “Wherever you look you will see engineering’s positive impact on humanity,” he told his daughter. He explained how engineers get to innovate, solve problems, and improve communities. He mentioned the prestige and good pay. He even played on her emotions. “Imagine how life would be like without engineers,” he said. “Engineers avert disasters and protect the world. Be part of that and create a change!” But none of his advice or encouragement worked. His daughter’s answer was still no.
Qusi’s desire for his daughters to become engineers is unusual, which is part of the problem. A recent survey asked 770 parents in 150 countries about the careers they wanted for their kids, who were eleven to sixteen years old. Parents of boys were twice as likely as parents of girls to say that science and technology was the field they most wanted their child to pursue. The disparity was even bigger for engineering in particular. While 11 percent of parents would choose engineering for their son, only 1 percent would choose it for their daughter.
Even though Qusi is among the 1 percent of parents who wanted his daughters to become engineers, he still couldn’t spark their interest. He asked them why they weren’t drawn to engineering, and they said that none of their teachers ever talked about it as a career, so they never considered it. That concerned Qusi, who thinks that schools should encourage students to become engineers. He also saw his daughters struggle to stay engaged with chemistry and math because the teachers weren’t using real-life problems or examples. When they couldn’t understand the theory, his daughters and their friends often concluded that they weren’t smart enough for a math or science career.
Qusi also blames the male-dominated reputation of the engineering profession. “When people think about engineering,” he says, “they often think about hard hats, steel beams, winches, long hours, relocation every few years, and instability. There is a misunderstanding that engineering involves tedious or hard physical labor suitable for men only.” Lurking behind those misperceptions is a lack of female role models, which makes it harder to get girls excited about becoming engineers.
The data bears out Qusi’s concerns about the lack of educational pipelines for girls into STEM. Girls and boys perform similarly in math and science during primary school, but girls never participate in computer science and engineering at the same rate as boys. Although women are earning close to 60 percent of all bachelor’s degrees, they earn only 43 percent of math degrees, 39 percent in physical sciences, 19 percent in engineering, and 18 percent in computer science.
These disparities carry over into the workforce. In the U.S., women fill only a quarter of all STEM jobs. Sometimes art-related jobs are added to this group―changing the acronym to STEAM―which may raise the percentage of women slightly. But overall numbers hide the extremely low participation rates of women in engineering and computer science. Most women head into the social, biological, and life sciences, leaving women to fill only 11 percent of jobs in physics, astronomy, and engineering. Women are particularly scarce in mechanical engineering, where they make up only 8 percent of the workforce. Even worse, the percentage of women in computing jobs has actually decreased from 37 percent in 1995 to only 22 percent in 2017. This is likely linked to the massive gender pay gap in the field. For those holding an advanced degree and working full-time in science or engineering, women’s median annual salary is over 31 percent less than men’s.
Perhaps most disturbing is that many women who earn STEM degrees don’t end up in STEM jobs. Thirty-eight percent of women who get engineering degrees stop being engineers or never take an engineering job in the first place. Almost half of women who enter the tech field eventually leave―a rate that’s more than double that of men. The exit rate is particularly high for women after they have their first child because of the minimal support for childcare and nursing, and the lack of flexible hours. This loss doesn’t just cost women, it also costs the tech industry itself. Silicon Valley tech companies spend more than $16 billion a year in turnover costs to replace and re-train workers to fill jobs that women and minorities leave.
